Sometimes it seems as if we are all chasing the wind. We always have to go on and on. Successes are not seen, let alone celebrated. The next steps must be taken immediately. It seems like it is a belief that we all have inherited: don’t talk the talk, but walk the walk. And you don’t feel like it? Just change your attitude.

We always emphasize the problems. What could be better? Do you learn from your mistakes? But wait a minute: what about the things that are going well? How often do we really think about that?

In my life, the focus was always on negativity. I did not have a safe childhood. And that puts you at a disadvantage. It was always wrong. Since birth. There was domestic violence and there was always substance abuse around me. As a child, you are not aware of how dysfunctional a situation is. And then self-reproach sets in. I thought it was my fault. In the end, I started using drugs. Just like my family. So at a certain point, I had to leave. want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

I could stay with friends for a while. Sleeping on couches. But at a certain point that’s all over as well, there’s no more elbow room. I broke away from my environment and then I became homeless.

And then you end up at the night shelter. It sounds strange, but that was the first stable place I’ve stayed till then. Because it was my own choice and I was no longer dependent. So I did not experience that as distressing. From a societal point of view, maybe you aren’t worth much, but it depends on what label you put on it. For me, it was pretty good. 

That survival mode came with alertness. And that was positive for me, because I had become passive because of using drugs. That’s why becoming homeless is one of the best things that happened to me. I’ve learned so much through this situation.

Realize where you are in life,  and especially take into account what happened in the past. Be gentle. That is what I believe in and what I often tell others. Strangely enough, it is advice that I myself still do not follow very often. Another lesson: dare to ask for help and don’t be afraid to accept it. I still find that difficult myself: I only recently started to open up, little by little.

HOW IS FLORIS

DOING NOW?

The photos, interviews, and film recordings were made during a period in which Floris was homeless. Fortunately, that is different now. He has been helped to find a house by the foundation ‘Onder de Bomen’ (Under the Trees). He lives together with three others in a nice family house.

His recovery plan consists of psychological support so that he will soon be able to do everything himself again. Floris would also like to receive appropriate therapy for his past traumas.

Floris dreams of having his own music studio, but to be able to pay for it, he needs a job. But before he can go to work, he needs some more time to deal with his past.